Haters gonna hate

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Last week I got a couple of messages on Facebook in regards to my blog posts. It’s always funny to me that people can be so bold as to call you out on your personal story, yet they are afraid to do it in a public forum, instead they message you so as not to be seen. I mean, If any of you know me, I am not a fighter and honestly, I just don’t care to expend any energy on haters. It takes a lot to get me to fight back. I am an avid grace-giver, but it just floored me as to peoples responses to MY personal story.

Maybe they lash out from fear, maybe they comment out of an ignorance of the facts, but let me tell you, commenting to anyone suffering with a food-related stronghold that you should just go eat a big mac, isn’t productive. I get that sometimes you just don’t know the right thing to say, but as most of our mammas taught us growing up, if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.

It’s been timely that I have picked up Brene’ Browns latest book “Rising Strong” and began reading it this week, because this truth-telling isn’t for the faint of heart. She says, “I believe that vulnerability-the willingness to show up and be seen with no guarantee of outcome-is the only path to more love, belonging, and joy.”

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Being vulnerable and living honestly comes with risks, but as I am also slowly seeing unfold, it comes with great reward. How many of us walk around our entire lives with a mask on, longing to be known, but scared of the rejection that can come with that? If we’re honest, most of us live with layers of masks, not even sure of our own true feelings deep down under years of hiding. We live in the age of Facebook where people only post the highlight reels of their lives. That family vacation that was a disaster, lets post the pic of all of us smiling. That awful day with your kids when you go to bed hoarse from yelling, feeling as defeated as ever, lets post that selfie of me and my kids smiling and hashtag it #lovinglife. I know I am guilty of it, things can be a total mess in my life or my day, but I’m sure going to put the best out there on Facebook for the world to see.

Sadly, because of this, we only see everyone else’s best, and we begin to feel isolated and alone, like we are the only ones that struggle, the only ones who’s kids disobey, make us scream, and make us question our parenting daily. We all have relationship struggles, married or single. We all have doubts and insecurities. I could go on and on, but that’s just the tip of the iceberg. We live in a world that is broken and hurting, no one is exempt. If we were real we’d see that every single person struggles and if you are able to call someone else out on their struggles, then to me it shows your own insecurities and while I’m sorry you feel that way, it’s not your right to push your own issues on me.

To be honest, once the dark and scary stuff is out in the light it’s not so scary anymore. I am willing to live authentically even if that means people have a problem with it. I guarantee you there are more people who can relate to me than those who choose to judge me. We all just want to get our insides out to others and be fully accepted as we are. The beauty is that God accepts us regardless and when we (I) can get to that place of letting Him be the only approval we seek then we are that much further along. We are accepted regardless by Him and all the haters don’t have a thing on us. So if you would like to criticize and have an opinion on MY story and MY life, feel free, I will love you and give you grace, because that’s who I am, but your opinion has no defining place in my life or my story.

So until then, I’ll be here living my life, shaking them haters off.
(and this is who I am channeling when the haters post) 🙂

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Jackie

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